How It Began

My 4 a.m. epiphany did not come while lying awake unable to sleep. I was awake because it was my job to be.

At that point in my life I was working at a treatment facility for adolescent boys and while they were sleeping my main job - aside from a small amount of paperwork and light cleaning - was to stay awake. During a 10 or 12 hour shift, TV got old after awhile and even I couldn't read for that long night after night. So I started wondering what I could do to occupy the time which would be both productive and something I enjoyed.

I noticed that the other employee I worked with most often worked on a book she was writing. I admitted to having a love of writing and had even written 3 books when I was a child filling up 1 spiral notebook after another. I loved it! At the time I couldn't seem to write fast enough with the stories that filled my head. But somehow I got away from it. I told my coworker I used to write but hadn't done so in years (besides journaling). Then she told me I should pick it up again even suggesting I pick up one of my old books and work on it again. To this suggestion I thought, Are you crazy? I was 11 or 12 when I wrote those. They are so bad! Stories filled with he said, she said, and a lot of bad description.

But the suggestion sank deep because before I knew it I was reworking that original story I wrote using the same general setting, characters, and plot and realized this story had been in my head for years reworking itself though I hadn't realized. And so I began writing again. Those long nights turned into what seemed like very short hours pouring over my story wondering why I had gone so long ignoring my passion. I let those thoughts of it's not good enough win. But not anymore. I spent the next several months writing nearly every day until, because of the economy,  the facility I worked for closed and I lost my job. Though devastating I used the opportunity to plunge full time into school once again and pursue my dream of being able to work from home. I still wrote but I had to divide my time. Just over a year later I landed, what I like to call my dream job, as a medical transcriptionist working out of my home.

I have worked as a transcriptionist now for over a year, and though I love my job, it has affected my writing. Working full time at any job along with the normal every day responsibilities of life really cuts into your writing time. So I am learning to adjust. I take suggestions from those who have even more on their plate than I do and still find time to write. I cut things out of my life that aren't as important. I try to be organized and practice good time management techniques. It's a struggle but it's worth it.

And I am thankful for those long quiet nights when the rest of the world was asleep giving my mind the chance to be creative, to dig deep, and to put thoughts into words and words on paper. Because I am a writer. I may never be published, but I've learned I'm still a writer. I write because it's my passion. I write to get the stories out of my head. I write because it's this driving force that won't leave me alone. I write because I can't not write.